One more day left in 2021 and I have not heard a word from you or about you. I was sitting on the couch with my mother – your grandmother, Agnes – on Christmas Eve and she asked me if I had heard from you. She can’t remember what day it is and what she ate for dinner, but she asked about you.
Maybe she sensed you. Or maybe she felt my grief from me losing you. I don’t know but you came to her mind.
I had a good year overall but am grieving the loss of my position of 17 years. I know you didn’t like that I had a career and put a lot of focus and energy into my job. It’s just who I am and doesn’t take away the fact that I love and loved you deeply and fully and there is a big hole in my heart because you are gone.
Another year without out you . . .
Mom
About Sandy
I was married at age 19 and had my son when I was 24 years old. When he was nearly 2 years old I decided to leave my husband. We had nothing in common. I was so lonely. He was an avid hunter and fisherman and while I tried to get into hunting and fishing it just was not my thing. While I was thrilled to be a mom, I spent many lonely weekends with my son.
Ironically when I separated from my husband, my husband fought for sole custody and moved my son 1,000 miles away from me. I paid child support and found ways to be with my son throughout the years. We developed a wonderful relationship and he grew into a responsible young man.
When he was 26 years old his grandfather passed away and he decided to cut me out of his life . . . I set up this website to find some type of solace and speak to my son . . .
Silence Outloud 